Ocean – Questions

**You’ll find a video by John Butler for a song called Ocean. Feel free to play it as you read.

In a vulnerable act of authenticity, I’ve decided to write to you what fills my mind daily. Questions; some to which I have answers and others, for which I am still searching. Some may perceive it as unnecessary. Some may find a mirror. It is not my intention, purpose, nor decision to tell you what to find. Take what you need. If something resonates with you, please feel free to share your thoughts with me. Thank you.

Like the ocean, I am deep, powerful, and mysterious. Even to myself, parts are unknown. Some days I am patient, consistent, and peaceful. Other days, my heart and mind rage like storms that produce hurricanes and tidal waves. I become restless. I follow the moons pull. And I smash against the shores of my own soul. What lies inside me that is undiscovered? What in me creates the storms? How do I discover it? Why am I searching?

Deep, unrelenting, filled, home. This is me. This is the ocean. How can I be all of who I am if I do not know all of myself? What can I let go of? What can follow the path of nature and disappear from my identity? What can pass on and what must stay? What must remain? What must push and pull? How can I be all that I am?

The loving? The sarcastic? The kindhearted? The judgmental? The intellectual? The creative? The pacifist? The war-monger? The rage-filled? The peaceful? The impulsive? The thoughtful? The glutton? The self-disciplined? The prejudice? The unconditional lover? The dismissive? The embracing? The warm soul? The cold shoulder? The soft handed? The hardened heart? The imaginer? The pragmatic and practical? The idealist? The realist? The bold? The meek? The isolated? The surrounded?

Of this all, what can I be? Can I be it all? None of it? We’ll see. Just like many creatures in the ocean, parts of me will reveal themselves or breach as they need to; out of enjoyment and out of necessity. The ocean (me).

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